Society has become self-focused. Some might call the entitled self selfish or self-centered Begin to free one’s self from the tyranny of power tactics, ego, and the relational havoc they generate.

Much of what is motivating for human behavior is action that serves the ego of the individual, the true self as we are at the moment.  The term as it is being used herein, may not relate directly to the psychoanalytic view of ego which is conceptualized as the buffer between the Id and the Superego, but more of ego addressed to a broader and more universal definition of all things related to the self of an individual.  Therefore ego in this writing relates to the individuality and one’s singular identity, which some may consider the foundation of personality.

Society has become increasingly “self-focused” and there exists in many arena of culture a fundamental tyranny generated by the supremacy of entitled selfhood. Some might call the entitled self by negative labels such as selfish or self-centered, or the grand titles attached to self-acceptance and worthiness.

Regardless of the name there is this tremendous disconnect in society as a whole between the public relations and substance of the self.  There exists a clear bifurcated thought process that both promotes the entitled self-hood and then also condemns that same unrestricted self hood.  What is clear is that rampant entitled selfhood has created or supports many societal woes and personal tragedies. Entitled Selfhood, can play out in any number of possibilities in the lives of an individual.

There exists a natural occurring psychological heuristic which each normally functioning human being possesses, that makes comparisons and judgments almost constantly while conscious and alert. The foundation of those comparisons and judgments are based in comparisons to the individual self, with those things that support the ego being “good or right” and those that do not support the ego as being “bad or wrong”.  This binary mental activity is most often in servitude to our selfhood.  Herein lies a danger for the healer, it becomes very easy to apply our own evaluations to others and judge the goodness or appropriateness of their behavior based on what our individual measuring stick might be.

To function optimally it is essential to step away from the entitled selfhood into a NON-EGOIC position.  This is essential to begin to free one’s self from the tyranny of power tactics, and the relational havoc they generate.  It is fairly obvious to move forward, repair or build a satisfying and sustainable relationship it needs to be less about “ME” or being true to ourselves, but an act of creation of “WE”. Building a solid “WE” is a projective future oriented activity and thought process.

In summary, though it might read well and sound great to Be True to Yourself, Love yourself, Accept yourself, but those that are struggling if difficult relationships already are quite competent at these, and what they need is to move away from an over focus on entitled selfhood and more on a future with a shared equality between the participating “SELVES”

If afflicted by the symptoms of depression, anxiety, or trauma we encourage you to call our office at (480) 478-4221 or schedule a complementary thirty minute consultation with one of our therapists at Psychological Health and Wellness, meet with one of our psychotherapists and learn how our trauma counselors can help you live a life free from the suffering effects of anxiety, depression, trauma and conflict. We are located in Mesa, AZ.