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Anger, Predatory Rage and the Traumagenic Family – Part 3

Author: admin, 05 21st, 2010

Some of the strategies that become apparent in predatory anger are listed below:

  1. Losing control to get their own way
  2. Trains others to avoid them when angry or else
  3. Utilize threats of harm to self or others
  4. Utilize threats to property or pets
  5. Actively control interactions through Sarcasm, Name calling, Put Downs, Rude comments, being critical and harshly judgmental, and being angry when others attempt connections
  6. Claim that they “lost control” after and aggressive, destructive or abusive incident
  7. Uses anger to have power in a situation
  8. Others become timid and “walk on eggshells” when they have to discuss problems or responsibilities
  9. Size people up for how much power they have and respond differently based on their view of that power
  10. Reacts negatively to or dominates those that appear to have less power
  11. Act charming toward those with more power
  12. Resist developing relationships with those that might be more powerful than they or threaten their power
  13. Use omission and vagueness to confuse or avoid
  14. Pretend to have misunderstood
  15. Put others on the defensive when they are clearly wrong
  16. Put others on the spot so that they wind up explaining themselves rather than focusing on resolving a problem
  17. Use statements like “you don’t love me” “you don’t trust me” “ you don’t appreciate me” as away to avoid dealing with an issue and deflect away

Dr. Bruce Perry and other professionals suggests that if there are other factors added to the traumagenic family dynamics described above that there will be an escalation of expressed violence attached to the predatory anger and rage.  List of factors:

  1. Becoming more detached from each other and from common unifying beliefs of a community then there is more expressed violence.
  2. Becoming desensitized to the emotional needs of others, loose or impair empathic ability then there is more expressed violence.
  3. Promoting hateful ideologies within the family dynamic that makes groups or classes of people to be viewed as different, bad or even less than human then there is more expressed violence.
  4. When alcohol or drugs are used regularly or at addictive levels then there is more expressed violence.

Predatory anger and rage can be thought of as a motivated strategy to obtain or possess some perceived end.  Since the patterns tend to be long standing and having impacted the normal developmental process of the individual, these stratagems are seen as normal, and part of the ordinary world of the individual, and not seen as being aggressive or hostile but more easily characterized by organic sense that this is “how things are”.

These patterns of predatory anger and rage contribute to unsatisfying interpersonal interactions and exchanges, with the accompanying frustration and maybe even recognition that the behaviors are not generating the desired outcomes.  However recognition of the failure to achieve the ultimate goal is not generally self correcting primarily due to the rigidity of the stratagem.

Rather than act differently they increase the use of the strategy, which further spirals dissatisfaction and failures.  Perpetual and repeated attempts to use the strategy creates a cycle of escalating attempts to meet the needs for control, connection and emotional safety through predatory acts and those failures drive more of the same.


If you are afflicted by the symptoms of depression, anxiety or trauma, if you suffer from sexual addiction or if you are seeking help for relationship conflicts in your life we encourage you to call our office at (480)-382-1257 or schedule an initial consultation with one of our therapists at Psychological Health and Wellness. Meet with one of our dedicated mental health specialists to learn how our trauma counselors can help you live a life free from the suffering effects of anxiety, depression, trauma, addition and conflict. We are located in Mesa, AZ near Gilbert, within the metro Phoenix area, Maricopa County, Arizona.

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