This is a ten part series on what factors might help you improve the quality of communication within your family.

Family Communications part #2: Family Culture. An ability to know how and why you and your family see things the way you do.

In the world today there are many messages on diversity and tolerance.  For diversity, there are entire college classes devoted to understanding minorities and appreciating the cultures of those outside the mainstream culture.  Companies invest a tremendous amount increasing employee sensitivity to the cultural diversity of their co-workers.

There is a very wide acceptance that these classes or trainings are essential for organizations to function at an adequate and successful capacity.  What receives much less attention is those activities that raise awareness of the family culture and how that culture impacts the quality and effectiveness of the family communication.

To be an effective communicator within the family setting one must possess knowledge of how and why the family members interact as they do.  This is perhaps an obvious statement to the reader, but for many people, they go through life only marginally aware of the way they communicate.

An example of this is the mother who desperately wants her child to grow into a responsible mature adult and engages in a relentless campaign to help her child learn responsibility. Unfortunately many if not most of the mother’s statements come across as hostile criticism of a hateful nature.  She doesn’t understand why she isn’t getting the results she desires, and in turn escalates the same behavior because she so badly wants her child to be successful.  This is not an uncommon example of one way family members can be unaware, or careless about how and why they are acting the way they do.

If there is a general failure to know how and why you or your family communicate the way they do then it opens the door to greater anxiety, depression, and family relations problems.

If when you look at your own families, you find it difficult to grasp the “hows” and “whys” then maybe you should visit with someone that can help you come to a better understanding about family dysfunction.