How many times have you found yourself planning your response before you have heard all of what a family member is saying? This fairly common family communication style is frequently found in families where members feel unheard, or unappreciated. This is a common family pattern with those that suffer from poor self-esteem, and depression.
I had a couple come in for marriage counseling who were having a lot of problems communicating. They fought constantly. Their marriage was in crisis.
He was an engineer; he talked very logic-based, very reason-based. She was all emotion and everything was an emotional thing for her. He was really attracted to that in the beginning and she was attracted to him because he was organized and logical guy.
Eight years later, they’re no longer attracted to each other. So they talked about what they felt like they needed to do which was work on their ability to communicate with each other and hear each other in the language that they used. Read the rest of this entry »
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