This is a continuation of my inner bully series.
The inner bully hosts a plethora of toxic friends. These friends were once nice appropriate preferences that have now become Jehovahian absolutes or musts. You will also notice that the Bully utilizes primarily binary thought processes full of judgment. Read the rest of this entry »
The first and most important thing you need to know about your inner Bully is that no matter how distorted and false his attacks may be, he is almost always believed. When your Bully says, “God, you’re dumb,” and that voice inside your head fills you up with self disgust, this judgment seems just as true to you as the awareness that you’re tired this morning, or that you have brown eyes, or that you don’t understand the latest video game or computer software as well as you “should”. Read the rest of this entry »
One of the things that are very common in family communication is that people operate in a rather mindless way. Frequently we are unaware of what our silent messages are really communicating.
One time a client spent considerable time trying to convince me that she wasn’t communicating anything to her husband or children when she refused to speak with them or would behave sulkily. Of course through a discussion of this she finally came to realize that these silent communications were often louder and clearer than the verbal things she might say.
Every human being is striving to meet certain psychological and emotional needs. These needs or drives can be simplified into common themes. It is not the search to obtain one or more of these that are problematic, but how people go about doing so. Read the rest of this entry »